Day-to-day life is, more or less, a series of routines that we repeat at nauseam. Yes, there are often hiccups and bumps in the road that cause delay, way-lays and complete detours. The routines come and go and change with the seasons - of the year AND of life. For the most part, though, each day has a certain amount of predictability that I enjoy.
One of our current routines is dropping Caleb off at school. We get ready at the same frantic pace, we drive the same route, we do the same things (more or less) 5 days out of every week. My absolute favorite part of our routine is after you, my dear Caleb, get out of the car. You hop out of the rear, passenger-side door. You usually tumble out like a clumsy waterfall spilling over an obstacle in its path - forcefully, with your backpack swinging from your back and some sort of hat in hand. [Baseball cap, derby hat, beanie - you name it, you wear it.] After we say our 'goodbyes' and 'have a good days', you compose yourself and get the door closed. And, here comes my favorite part - you've always stretched one arm up to the passenger window to sign to me an 'I LOVE YOU' in sign language. All I can see is the end of your arm and your face from chin-up flashing me a sweet smile. You started this routine all on your own and it makes me smile and feel SO special every time.
Well. Not today. I didn't get an 'I LOVE YOU' today. While you were mid-spill-out-the-door today, I heard you holler, "Hey, there's Madison!" You slammed the door and took off running without so much as a farewell glance over your shoulder. Who is this Madison? As far as I could tell, she was the brown haired little girl sporting the turquoise skirt, pink headband and shiny, silver sandals that was hop-skipping her way onto the playground.
[Pardon me, but this can't be helped...]
DARN YOU, MADISON!!!
Even if only for today, you have stolen the love, affection and attention that is rightfully mine from my precious Caleb and I didn't like it one bit! I imagine that this was just one of those unforeseen hiccups and that everything will be back to normal tomorrow. But, the whole thing reeked with an ominous foreboding for our future that I just can't say that I'm okay with.
I know that some day there will be a special lady in your life that trumps your Mommy, and I'm okay with that. It will be a good thing, I'm sure. But, by some day I'm thinking when you're 23, at least! So, for the next 17 years or so, I'd better still be #1 in your book, Pal, and don't you forget it!
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